Ah, my blog is SO pathetic, I don't know how to salvage it. Figured I should just let it die out or something, you know? But then I realised a whole big chunk of my life and my emotions throughout a LONG period of time's been recorded in here. And it'll be a pity to let go of this like that. Then again, I'm the kind of person who can never keep things going. I suck at finishing things I start. I lose interest so easily. And like so many other things in my life, It's only a matter of time before this blog is history. We'll see. I wish I had inspiration like I used to. Like when I first started this.
Kay, so this shall be a tiny update about my BORING life. I really don't have much of a life. What, with Pritish leaving and everything. So I've just been trying to make time for people and things, basically like balancing shit out if you know what I mean. Like I try to spend a good amount of time at home with my mom and brothers, but not really. And, some time with Nelly like I always do. Then there's Luciano, and there's also the godfamily. And Brian's coming to town tomorrow. I screwed things up with Jia today. I hope you understand babe, that I didn't blow you off for shit. At least I honestly HONESTLY didn't mean to. I do miss you, and I want to talk to you about things. I do.
So, from the latter you can tell how AVERAGE my life is at the moment. It's not that I don't enjoy it's simplicity. But truth be told, I'm not sure if I like it or not. I do miss the times when entire weekends were spent at pritish's with my closest friends and my boyfriend. When we'd all squeeze into the bed to watch a scary movie, or get drunk, or just staying out late, damn, and sleeping and waking up next to someone so special. Those were good times, maybe the best times of my life yet. I ain't sayin life isn't fine now, because it is, in it's own right. But I very much prefer the good old days. Life was VERY FUCKING GREAT then.
onetwotreefour
- Salvation?
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onetwotreefour- September 26th, 0:39
- D:
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- onetwotreefour
- September 12th, 13:43
I feel like I'm sabotaging us, I'm holding back, and hiding my real emotions (though I'm not any good at it) and I'm being selfish and cautious and it's only because I don't want to get hurt. Because I know that if I did let myself go completely, I'll definitely get my heart broken. So I'm always dying on the inside, and sometimes it shows. I won't even blame you for thinking something is perpetually wrong with me. You're good, that's almost true. Now it's like I'm approaching a dead end and I don't know where to go from here. I don't know how to make things right. I really screwed up. I wish you'd help me save us. I wish I mattered to you just a little bit more.
- I'm so giving up on this sad, pathetic, excuse of a blog.
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- onetwotreefour
- September 6th, 11:49
I've been neglecting this blog, but it's only because tumblr is taking up majority of my time online, and tumblr is so very addictive.
I'm on holidays and I've gotten much lazier since my days now consist of... well nothing much, really. Danielle and I've been over at Ryan's a lot the past week. We went sun tanning last weekend and got a tad darker. It wasn't satisfying and I intend to go back for another tan, but wtf is up with the weather lately? Seriously. The weather is such a bloody important factor affecting my mood. It being cold and gloomy and shit really just makes me want to hide at home.
Pritish woke me up with really good news this morning, so I'm up alot earlier today. I'm going to follow the boyfriend to Tampines to watch his soccer match later in the evening, but I'm going to rot for the time being, think about what to do about lunch, attempt to UP my tumblarity... I have such an interesting life don't I.
- :(
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- onetwotreefour
- August 24th, 20:00
So, for the past couple of months, we've been spending weekends at Pritish's place. Like we're there every single weekend without fail. It's been so great, and we have SO much fun, we squeeze into the bed and watch horror movies and shit like that. But it will all come to an end soon. Not many people are going to understand this except the people I need, cuz they're gonna have to deal with it too. You probably aren't even going to understand anything I'm saying but I think I just need to do abit of a rant, to let this out. Okay, fuck it. I'm not even going to write about this right now. I will cope. but how is the BFF gonna take it?
Just know that whatever happens I'll be with you every step of the way. I'll always have you, and you'll always have me. Remember that.
- you
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- onetwotreefour
- August 14th, 14:46
I LOVE THE WAY you still manage to come in and out of my life as you please. You can appear when you want and I, being the considerate person that I am, let you. Of course, when I try to- it blows up in my face. DO NOT MISTAKE MY KINDNESS FOR WEAKNESS. You want my attention? I suggest you quit playin’ and KEEP it or have absolutely nothing to do with it. Truthfully, I’m one of the very few women in your life who know you inside and out- and realistically, I’m the only one out of those few who knows you like the back of my damn hand. You preach respect? Now tell me, how would you feel if I just came out of nowhere, acting like I wanted a spot back, only when it’s beneficial to me? You still claim a very important part of my life, but sometimes I’m just not so sure if you even understand how important that part is. You have everything you could possibly need in your life but I still believe you’re missing the most important point- and I think you know it just as much as I do. Knock some real sense into that success-driven mind of yours or will I have to?
- :D
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- onetwotreefour
- August 14th, 13:09
Okay, I'm like in love with this picture. They both look SO good here, and it's gonna sound so cliche, but every time I look at that smile, I feel like I'm melting away.
- VALERIE ONG.
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- onetwotreefour
- August 11th, 23:16
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VALERIE ONG! I FRICKEN LOVE YOU TO DEATH, and I read your blog and it seemed like you had one helluva birthday. It's good to know, my birthday last year sucked SO bad. Thanks to the O levels. Anyway, I sent you a text and it was kinda late, but I didn't forget your birthday!! Do you think sweet sixteens are overrated? I think they are. Nevertheless, Happy sweet sixteen, lovvvvveeeee <3
- FUCKYEAH
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- onetwotreefour
- August 2nd, 21:27
I'm like officially addicted to fuckyeah tumblrs. Okay, tumblr in general. OMG, they are so fucking entertaining, they keep me alive in school. Seriously.
My weekend was VERY great, I sometimes think life cannot get any better than this. Except for the slight hangover yesterday which really is a small price to pay considering what happened on Friday night. My boyfriend is SO SO great, he doesn't complain about taking care of me when I get so smashed and SO fucking embarrassing. And say such stupid things :) (Okay that one, he questions me abou the day after. I am such a horrible person because you apparently say the truth when you're drunk, and I say the darndest things so he probably thinks I constantly doubt him) But I have told myself I won't ever get drunk like that with Luciano around again. I hope, and I'm really gonna try. I don't want to mess things up this way. Let's see what happens next week. My weekend was spent with my favouritest people in the world. This makes the weekend feel so damn short. You wait the whole fucking week for it, and it passes like THAT.
I am thinking about giving up on this blog. Okay, maybe not. But I get lazy to do this and it's getting boring.
Tumblr however, is awesome. Check mine out :) http://dreamanothersunset.tumblr.com/
- L.O.V.E
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- onetwotreefour
- July 26th, 23:32
I am so fucking scared to do this again and you cannot begin to imagine how much this feels like I'm free falling. It's like I know I only feel more for you every damn day. And this scares the shit out of me because I put up so many walls around myself as defenses, and you're really tearing them down.
Did you know, that we don't go into relationships already in love? Because love is so abstract and I don't even understand it. Yet. Though I really think that I'm beginning to............ And when I know for certain that I do, I will celebrate, because I certainly have never been in love before.
- Like family
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- onetwotreefour
- July 21st, 19:40
Some people who matter and I cannot live without :) I look like a fucker in the photos. But that's how my face falls :(
<33333
- <3
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- onetwotreefour
- July 19th, 22:15
Haven't gone home in DAYS. Friday night got pretty crazy. I got smashed and acted like a crazy bitch. Thank God for Luciano who was MAD PATIENT and took EXTREMELY good care of me :D
Yesterday and today was all about sleeping in and recuperating. Met up with Luciano for a nice swim this afternoon. He makes me so happy.
Btw, I made me a tumblr!! I think the internet is really consuming me. dreamanothersunset.tumblr.com/
- <333
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- onetwotreefour
- July 13th, 21:16
The past couple of days have been great :))) And I just had the coolest/nicest/most romantic evening everrr.
Spent the weekend at Changi where we had some really good quality time with non-related relations. We've got tests in school these two weeks. Needless to say, I'm quite screwed.
Anyway, I don't really care right now. I'm on top of the whole fricken world :DD
- le fashion
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- onetwotreefour
- July 8th, 22:20
Le fashion is fucking rad. I would say it's on par with le love. After I found Le love (www.leloveimage.blogspot.com) I didn't think I'd find another website as interesting/entertaining. Then I found galadarling.com, and some other fashion blogs. There's also fashion toast, shop toast. The bar below my broswer's pretty much packed with shit like that. So many things to keep up with, so little time! Actually, I practically spend the whole day surfing fashion blogs and more so I definitely CANNOT survive without the internet. Twitter's another problem on it's own. LOL.
Jessica Szohr from Gossip Girl. Am totally obsessed with her at the moment. And Taylor Momsen also sorta interests me.
But what occupies my thoughts...is the person who makes my heart fucking flutter. Dead serious.
- It's a mad world...
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- onetwotreefour
- July 7th, 19:59
But it gets better when I see you smile :)
- MY WEEKEND
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- onetwotreefour
- July 5th, 21:52
Ditched school on Friday with Shervin cuz of the stupid thermometer rule in school. It's fucking redundant, but whatever.
Then we crashed over at Pritish's for two nights with a bunch of very cool people.
This involved P getting tipsy on a couple of sips of wine, movie marathons, having the most enjoyable conversation ever at this pretty rad playground under the moonlight with someone way special, squeezing into a king sized bed with six other people, soccer in P's garden, poking fun at Jerome, P's friend who's asian but is supposedly french and speaks the accent and is hella weird, and possibly falling in love. It was mad fun! :)
- update
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- onetwotreefour
- July 1st, 0:40
Haven't really been on the computer in ages! That's mainly cuz I haven't been home much, and my dad's been using my laptop to do some of his work so I'm not allowed to use my own computer.
Year ones in my school are on e learning, all thanks to H1N1. The number of cases in my school alone are increasing VERY rapidly and we are hopeful they may just decide to extend this break. About e learning, I haven't done a single shit and I may be dead meat when school starts again.
Thursday night was spent with one hilarious bunch of people, including Nat, who fell extremely sick and had to be tested for H1N1. Apparently, his classsmate had it, so...Being the paranoid people that we are, and having even more paranoid Mom(s) I was made to stay at Ryan's for like, THREE days. I went out for dinner ONCE only to get lectured about social responsibility over the phone. Needless to say, this led to a VERY heated argument outside daily scoop and quite a number of expletives being shouted into the mobile. I can never go back there. It was not all that bad though, cuz we spent the time watching chuck and building houses in Sims 3 :) Obviously though, I missed my baby brother like fucking madness.
Met up with Jia this afternoon to buy a couple of birthday presents. Four people in the entire (extended/non-related) family are celebrating their birthdays in July. I bought three presents today, and couldn't afford to buy the last one. Just yet. Hanging with Jia was grreeaaattt. Danielle REALLYYY doesn't need me anymore and it's fucking depressing to think about :(
- DAMN
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- onetwotreefour
- June 22nd, 22:02
Four rules I will now follow (: Got to watch garden state!
- A burst of colour today
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- onetwotreefour
- June 17th, 23:25
Nobody understands my obsession with CHUCK. Maybe Ryan can relate? Season 3 comes out in the US (get this) March 10th 2010. WTFF?! It'll come out in Singapore in like what, 2011? Seeing as the box set of season 2 isn't even available here YET. I am going to die. I guess I will have to make do with watching seasons 1 and 2 over and over and over again. (which is SO NOT what I'm going now) hahaha.
During my chuck research, I found out the show's got 8 million viewers in the US alone. Think of the number this way... Imagine TWICE the TOTAL population of Singapore tuning into ONE television programme, at the same time. WHAT THE. I apologise for the over excitement, what with the capitalising and then making the words red... Expect alot of this. Definitely more to come. I have warned you... And I'm about to put up a clip of one of my MANY favourite bits throughout the seasons. (as soon as I've decided which one)
Got carried away trying to find the video. Maybe I'll do it tomorrow, cuz it's way past my bedtime. Goodnight! :D
- <3
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- onetwotreefour
- June 15th, 19:35
You're in a car with a beautiful boy, and he won't tell you that he loves
you, but he loves you. And you feel like you've done something terrible,
like robbed a liquor store, or swallowed pills, or shoveled yourself
a grave in the dirt, and you're tired. You're in a car with a beautiful boy,
and you're trying not to tell him that you love him, and you're trying to
choke down the feeling, and you're trembling, but he reaches over and
he touches you, like a prayer for which no words exist, and you feel your
heart taking root in your body, like you've discovered something you
don't even have a name for.
- Oh chuck..
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- onetwotreefour
- June 15th, 13:28
Yvonne Strahovski and Zachary Levi from CHUCK (:
